Why You Should't Provoke a Dead Priestess
by Crystal Mizuka
Summary: Inuyasha's sister meets Kikyo for the first time and things don't exactly go smoothly.
1. Episode 1

Disclaimer: It should be obvious that the characters from Inuyasha don't belong to me. The series and its characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi.  
  
Author's Notes: As with most of my fanfictions, certain original characters will be making the scene. Without them, this story really wouldn't make sense anyway.  
  
------Original Characters------  
  
Crystal is Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru's little sister. This particular version of Crystal stays true to the version that I use for my main fanfiction series ("The Dragon Tamer" and "DT: Friends and Foes") and also use in chatrooms. If you want more background, there's is a link to a more detailed character profile under my author profile. The character of Crystal is a creation of my own insane mind.  
  
Shiva is your not-so-typical martial artist and free-loading houseguest. He is noted for being part human, part Jurain and part Divine all in one. He has frequently invited himself to live in Crystal's apartment, which for the most part remains empty. One of his most famous moments was the time when Crystal hurled a refridgerator at him, which he dodged, leading to the door to the apartment being permenantly removed and the refridgerator being lodged in the hallway wall. Shiva repaired the refridgerator and it has since remained in the hallway. Remarkably, the other people in the apartment complex stay as far away from the area as possible. Beyond this, Shiva's noted traits are that he is always hungry, unless being fed or having just eaten, eating vast quantities of food in a short amount of time and his sub-space picnic basket. The character of Shiva belongs to Shiva.  
  
------Why You Shouldn't Provoke a Dead Priestess------  
  
Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango and Shippo were traveling through yet another nameless forest. The only thing that wasn't quite normal about this was the fact that Crystal was traveling with them, followed by a rather hungry looking Shiva. The group paused behind a row of bushes.  
  
Shippo: Isn't that--  
  
Sango: What is Kikyo doing here?  
  
Inuyasha was about to go into one of his usual "everyone stay here while I talk to Kikyo" routines, but paused when Crystal turned to face the group. She was grinning insanely, which could only mean one thing. Trouble.  
  
Crystal: I've been waiting to meet this Kikyo for a while now. What perfect timing!  
  
Inuyasha made a move to grab Crystal's arm and stop her from doing whatever it was she was about to do, but his hand closed around air. She was already out of reach and whatever damage was going to be done, would be done. There was no stopping her.  
  
Inuyasha: Do I want to know what this is about?  
  
Kagome: No idea.  
  
Miroku: Indeed.  
  
The group watched as Crystal left the cover of the bushes. Shiva had somehow gotten his hands on some ramen from Crystal's stash and was happily slurping away. Inuyasha did NOT notice.  
  
Crystal: So you're my brother's ex.  
  
Kikyo turned around to face the source of the voice that had spoken so rudely. The strange girl she ended up facing seemed to have appeared from nowhere. This did not explain the giggling that seemed to be coming from the row of bushes behind her.  
  
Kikyo: What?  
  
Crystal: Yeah, you do look a lot like Kagome!  
  
In the bushes, Shippo could not hold in his laughter. Inuyasha was in too much shock to hit him, although the idea would have been very tempting.  
  
Sango: Has she lost her mind?  
  
Shiva: Probably.  
  
Inuyasha: Does she have a deathwish or something?!  
  
They continued watching the scene before them. No one knew what to expect to see next, but they figured it was bound to be interesting.  
  
Kikyo: I'll have you know I'm the original!  
  
Crystal: Oh yeah, Kagome is YOUR reincarnation. How do I keep mixing that up?  
  
Miroku decided this was a good time to slip out from behind the row of bushes.  
  
Miroku: Crystal, it is unwise to provoke the dead priestess.  
  
Crystal: Really? Why's that?  
  
**Zap** Crystal did not expect that sudden blast of spiritual power in the least and flopped down to the ground. She closely resembled a fish out of water combined with something that had recently flown out of a volcano. Miroku winced.  
  
Miroku: That would be why.  
  
Crystal: Ouch...  
  
Inuyasha decided now was a good time to come out of hiding and make up some kind of explanation that would prevent further conflict. Crystal was already on her feet again, and for some reason she still had that insane grin plastered on her face. He decided maybe it would be easier to explain things when she wasn't conscious.  
  
Crystal: You're pretty good, but that won't be enough to finish me off.  
  
Kikyo: Are you some kind of idiot?  
  
Shippo's laughter was seriously starting to give Inuyasha a headache, which was something he did not need when this was going on. He solved this minor problem easily enough, and left Shippo with a throbbing lump on his head.  
  
Kagome: Why do you suppose Crystal insists on doing this?  
  
Shiva: I think it might be something along the lines of "Kikyo is the one that pinned my brother to a tree, so now it's payback time" in Crystal's mind. It does look like fun though.  
  
Sango: Coming from you, that really doesn't mean much.  
  
The group watched as Crystal took off running, being chased after by Kikyo who seemed to be levitating and shooting arrows at her at the same time. Crystal was dodging every shot, but the image of what was happening was hard not to watch.  
  
Miroku: I tried to stop her.  
  
Sango: It looks like we have a cat fight on our hands.  
  
Shippo: It looks more like a bitch fight to me.  
  
The background turned dark and flame-like as Shippo was confronted by Crystal and Kikyo. Shippo mentally wondered when they had gotten so fast and took off running.  
  
Shippo: AHH!!!  
  
The rest of the group exchanged sweatdrops.  
  
Kagome: Shouldn't we stop them?  
  
Inuyasha: Do you WANT to try stopping them?!  
  
Kagome: Good point.  
  
A few minutes later, Crystal returned with an unconscious Shippo in tow. She was holding him upside down by the tail, which seemed like the thing to do after his use of language. Kikyo wasn't far behind.  
  
Miroku: What exactly did you do to him?  
  
Crystal: We didn't do anything--he crashed into a tree and passed out from fear.  
  
Kikyo: Are you quite finished?  
  
Crystal: I'll be back for a rematch during the next full moon.  
  
Kikyo: Why the full moon?  
  
Crystal: Cause I have a feeling those powers of yours won't hurt me so much when I'm human.  
  
There was an exchange of sweatdrops.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
The End?  
  
Author's Notes: This was just an idea that came to me while I was talking with one of my friends at the bus stop. Who knows, if I get some reviews requesting a continuation, I might just become inspired to think of what could happen during the so-called "rematch". 


	2. Episode 2

Disclaimer: It should be obvious that the characters from Inuyasha and Ranma 1/2 do not belong to me. They all belong to Rumiko Takahashi.  
  
Author's Notes: I didn't think this concept would become a series, but anyway, here is the "rematch" episode that I know some of you have been waiting for!  
  
------How to Provoke a Dead Priestess------  
  
Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Shippo, Crystal and Shiva were traveling through the same nameless forest as before. The fact that this was happening during the last day of the full moon and Crystal was in her human form was only a coincidence. The fact that she was looking for Kikyo had absolutely nothing to do with why they were traveling through the same nameless forest. In fact, it had everything to do with why they were walking through the same nameless forest.  
  
Miroku: It would appear that Crystal has no intention of backing down.  
  
Shippo was keeping a safe distance between himself and the hanyou-gone- human for the moment. He did not want to experience a repeat of the last time he had dealt with both Kikyo and Crystal.  
  
Shippo: Does she ever back down?  
  
Inuyasha: That's what bothers me.  
  
Shiva: She's just stubborn.  
  
Inuyasha: In this case, that isn't a good thing.  
  
Kagome: This must be serious.  
  
Sango: What makes you say that?  
  
Kagome: Crystal usually listens to Inuyasha.  
  
After some more trivial walking through the forest, the group finally came across Kikyo. She didn't seem to care about their being there until she recognized Crystal, which wasn't too hard even with the transformation.  
  
Kikyo: I know why you are here, but who are they?  
  
Kikyo indicated the three boys with video cameras that were traveling beyond the usual group. One of these boys was none-other than Ryoga Hibiki and was headed off in the wrong direction as usual. Another of these boys was Mousse and he had the camera facing the wrong direction while he attempted to film a tree. The third boy was Ranma Saotome who was making an attempt at keeping the other two boys in order.  
  
Crystal: Er--they're here to film the contest.  
  
Crystal waved Ranma over. He lowered his camera and walkd over to her.  
  
Crystal: (whispering) How hard is it to keep those two under control?!  
  
Ranma: (also whispering) Ryoga has no sense of direction and Mousse isn't wearing his glasses! What do you think?!  
  
Inuyasha made a mental note that Crystal and Ranma were defying the style that their dialogue was supposed to be following. He grabbed Ryoga and Mousse and dragged them over by Ranma so he could deal with them.  
  
Kikyo: Are you finished fooling around?  
  
Crystal: If those three can keep themselves organized, then I think the contest is ready to begin.  
  
Kikyo: And what is the contest you have in mind?  
  
Crystal: It is only a short distance away from here.  
  
The group began walking again, following after Crystal. She was deliberately drawing this out as long as possible. The reached their destination.  
  
Kikyo: An archery contest? Are you crazy and an idiot?  
  
Crystal: I happen to be a decent shot when it comes to archery.  
  
Kagome: Are you sure this is a good idea?  
  
Crystal: This one is fool proof.  
  
Several minutes later Kikyo and Crystal had taken their first shots on the targets that had been mysteriously set up in the middle of the forest. The targets dissolved from the power that had been put behind the arrows and Kagome sweatdropped.  
  
Shippo: I take it you'd have to be a real genius to come up with a plan like THAT.  
  
Crystal: (slowly) Shippo?  
  
Shippo: (quietly) What?  
  
A dark background appeared behind Crystal as she took off after Shippo. The two of them vanished into the nameless forest.  
  
Kagome: I knew that was going to happen.  
  
Inuyasha: When did you become psychic?  
  
Kagome: When Shippo opened his mouth.  
  
Inuyasha: Fair enough.  
  
Kikyo: Are you all finished wasting my time?  
  
Crystal was up in a nearby tree. Shippo was with her and he was unharmed, although he still looked terrified. The sun began to set over the mountains and Crystal returned to her usual form, still standing up on the tree branch.  
  
Crystal: Not quite.  
  
Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango and Shiva were over by the camera crew who had managed to stick together through all of this. Shiva was once again eating ramen from Crystal's stash and Inuyasha again failed to notice this.  
  
Sango: Did she already forget what Kikyo can do to her when she has her powers?  
  
Miroku: It would appear so.  
  
Shiva: She'll just learn the hard way. It isn't a big deal.  
  
Crystal jumped down from her spot in the tree and landed within a few feet of Kikyo. For his own safety, Shippo decided he would stay in the tree.  
  
Crystal: (confidently) Give me your best shot.  
  
**Zap** Crystal crumpled to the ground in a charred heap. Kikyo started floating off into the forest.  
  
Kikyo: Feel free to challenge me again when you can stand up for more than two seconds from that.  
  
Crystal: Damn...I forgot about that.  
  
Shippo: Idiot...  
  
Crystal: What was that Shippo?  
  
Shippo: Eek!  
  
Inuyasha snatched the ramen away from Shiva. The two of them began snatching it back and forth and ended up in a dustcloud fight while trying to keep the remaining ramen from spilling. Everyone else who was still there sweatdropped.  
  
Kagome: Shouldn't we do something about this?  
  
Sango: It doesn't look like there is anything we can do.  
  
Miroku: Indeed.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
The End?  
  
Author's Notes: I think this fanfiction deliberately decided to turn itself into a series. It just doesn't want to end with a definate ending! 


End file.
